Mental Health Monthly: What is the Best Way to Heal from Spiritual Abuse?

Mental Health Monthly: What is the Best Way to Heal from Spiritual Abuse?

This is the second post in a “mental health monthly” blog post series by Lisa Gray. Lisa is a Marriage and Family Therapist with background in the meeting fellowship, and we are honored to have her perspectives featured here on our blog. 

Perhaps you are a victim of CSA or have recently left the work. Or perhaps, like me, nothing particularly bad ever happened to you growing up in the meetings, but you are still hurt from misinformation and from being highly controlled. Some of you may have had someone suggest going to counseling, but many of us were told that counseling was bad, scary, or that a counselor might try to talk us out of our faith.

According to therapist codes of ethics, particularly the American Counseling Association (ACA) code, therapists must respect a client’s religious beliefs, avoid imposing their own personal religious views, and create a space where clients can openly discuss their spirituality without feeling pressured to conform to the therapist’s beliefs. Does this mean that every therapist will respect your experience? Probably not. But any good therapist will do this.

Research consistently shows that the “fit” between therapist and client is the most important factor in healing, so no matter what kind of therapy you choose, liking your therapist is the most crucial piece. Also, therapy can be expensive, but there are options. Most therapists will offer a sliding scale if you ask. Pre-licensed therapists (you have to get 3,000 hours in most states before you can be licensed!) are a great and less expensive option – remember it’s not experience but rapport that counts.

Here are some types of therapy to consider and why you might choose them:

• Traditional Talk Therapy: You may find relief just talking openly about your experiences, doubts and fears with someone who offers unconditional positive regard.

• EMDR/Brainspotting: If talking is good but you still get triggered or have visceral body responses to some things, sometimes trauma therapy in the form of EMDR or Brainspotting can be very helpful. Learn more at www.emdr.org or www.brainspotting.com 

• Expressive Arts Therapy: If you are a creative type and you think that making art, dancing, music or creative writing might help you, get more information at www.ieata.org.

• Internal Family Systems: IFS is a very popular modality right now and is helpful for trauma survivors. IFS identifies all the different parts of you and explores how each part is impacting your thoughts, emotions, actions and physical sensations. More info at www.ifs-institute.com

• Somatic Experiencing: If you are someone who feels like your trauma lives in your body and you experience physical symptoms of your past experiences, Somatic Experiencing can be helpful as a body-focused trauma therapy. More info at www.traumahealing.org

• Eco-therapy: Many people feel close to God in nature, and being in nature in a therapeutic way can help heal spiritual issues. Check out the directory at www.ecopsychology.org

  
  

Lastly, your healing is your own. Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to, or even should, do any particular thing to heal. You might need to do several of these; you might not need to do any. Not only is it your right to heal, but it’s your right to heal the way that works best for you.